I got a cut on my finger from the damn blender...

And I don't sense any pain. Hell, I have morbid curiosity to let the damn thing bleed.


I'm so desensitized from all the things that has happened recently that I don't even care if I physically get hurt.

Lately, I dream of reaching the realm of tenderness. A place where the demons go away, a place where my heart lies that I know will screw up my life, and the touch of someone I love too much

Tender is that feeling that I'm waiting to come.














Without going into further details, I recently discovered that a friend who I was sort of seeing for the past year got into a relationship with some guy. She never gave me a chance. I asked her a few months ago if this relationship (between myself and her) could ever happen. The reply I got back was that she did not want to get back into one. I can't stand liars.






So...these past few months have been a sort of a faire les quatre cents coups (400 Blows). How much does a guy who's trying to get back his feet have to endure? I mean, I've already become a cynical bastard after witnessing one of my roommates destroy my car and friendship after a drunken joyride. That alone should've been enough, but I had to endure the cold responses from my parents post-graduation as well as having financial trouble. But no, this recent event had to happen and tops off everything bad that has happened to me.






I'm trying to make the best of it, but it's really tough. Y'know, if she's happy, then I'm fine.

ii tenki desu ne?